My Story

Well, I have been putting this off for a while now. Im not really sure why, just didnt want to put the effort in or something. I get lazy from time to time (most of the time), and always seem to put things off forever. I actually had half a post done before I quit and started with this one.

But anyways, I know that I talk a lot about God and being a Christian, but I just wanted to have a chance to explain why I think about these things, why and how I became a Christian. I wasnt always a Christian, a true Christian. Yeah, back in the day if I were filling out a census or something, I would have marked Christian under the religion part. But I wouldnt have understood what it meant to be a Christian.

So it all started when I was about 4 years old. My family and I had started attending the Church of God in Bremen, and I vividly recall (and my mom would probably agree) the very first Sunday we went, the pastor came up to my family to introduce himself, and I believe the first thing I said to him was, "You're fat." Bad start. So for the next several years we attended that church....and I absolutely hated it. Well, not at first. I actually didnt really care at first, I wasnt sure what was going on, but I just thought it was boring. But later on though, I remember nearly every Sunday morning begging my mom to let me stay home, maybe even faking a sickness here and there. I couldnt stand waking up so early, greeting people I dont like, listening to the hymns, hearing stories about Jesus, and having no idea what they were about. The best part about Sunday morning church was getting to go home. And then, for a while, I had to go to Wednesday night youth group, and I hated that too. So, after a few too many years, we suddenly all stopped going. Im not really sure when or why this occurred, but I was glad that it did.

Now, as a child I was never really a bad kid. Although my nickname, given to me by my mom, was Devil-child, but thats just because I was loud and liked to break things. But I was usually pretty obedient in school, never got in serious trouble, never got a detention, got good grades, so its not like I was a wild child or anything.

So lets fast forward to my junior year of high school. There was a new kid at our school. Now you might be thinking,"big deal, there are hundreds of new kids to every school." But you have to remember that this is Bremen, where everybody knows everything about everyone, and gossip gets around. So we got this new kid, and for the longest time, I did not know what his name was, so I called him "New Kid", even when he wasnt even that new anymore. But eventually, I figured out his name, Dustin (my best friend in high school, Andy, I dont think he ever figured out his name, he always called him Travis for some reason). Dustin was this tall, super skinny, pale, red-haired kid with a very unique laugh. He was friendly, but I personally thought he was annoying at first. But eventually, not sure when or how this happened, we became friends. Actually, we became pretty good friends. We used to go to volleyball games together, basketball games, movies, whatever. We hung out quite a bit. And then he wanted me to start going to youth group with him at Community Gospel Church. I was a little hesitant about this, seeing as I strongly disliked church and all. So the first several times he asked, I turned him down. But then he kept asking, so I gave in and went one Wednesday night. And I really enjoyed it. So I went the next week. And the next. Then I started going Sunday nights also. It was fun to hang out with my friends and meet new people my age from other schools at this youth group, but I still felt awkward at the "churchy" parts of it, but it was tolerable.

Then one night during my senior year, actually I believe it was a Wednesday night after youth group, I was up in my sisters room on her computer chatting away with girls and whatnot when my sister came in and said that there was an accident and a high schooler from Bremen was killed in it. As you can guess, it was Dustin. At first, I didnt really believe it. I figured that it had to be someone else, and I kind of just let it go that night, didnt think much of it. But when I got to school the next day, it sank in. I had learned the truth, and was still in shock. All day, the whole school did nothing but think of Dustin. He had crossed the center line on a straight, flat road and hit a car head-on while he was coming home from work. No one really knows why he crossed the center line though.

So a few days later, I had attended his funeral. During the viewing, when everyone visited with his parents, I remember standing in the insanely long line saying to myself, Im not going to cry. But the second I got up there and started talking to his parents, I just broke down. Also, I remember perfectly, sitting there listening to the pastor give his respects to Dustin, talking about his life and talking about all of the Bible verses he had highlighted in his personal Bible. Now I had known Dustin for over a year by now, and we were pretty close, he had told me things about his rough past, how he had changed over the years, some really personal things. And I remember sitting there at his funeral thinking,"man, this kid had it together, and all because of Christ." So, as the pastor went on talking, I bowed my head and said a little prayer, something really short, just telling God that I was ready. Ready for Him to move in on my life. Wow, I am kind of tearing up typing this, just because I am so happy that I had made that decision.

Having a close friend, my own age, die in a car accident had made me realize that we are just here....then we're gone. Just like that. Living....then not living, in a split second. Any given second. It scared me. It made me realize that it couldve be me. It couldve been me in a casket at 18. And what would I have to say for my life at that age? Nothing. I'd be burning.

So there you have, thats my story.